Afraid to sleep

I had a weird day today, but others had it worse.

I had planned to write a "geez, the kids today!" type post, but what I thought was the ugliest a day could be wasn't.

I'm just going to write and not take too much time to think about the order and best way to phrase things. I'm certainly not going to re-read to edit.

Living in the subtropics and having pets means fleas. Lots of them. It never freezes, so we never get to start over. Because of this battle, I had to flea bomb the house. This meant that I was banished and headed for my little coffee shop to finish a book over a cappuccino or two.

When I left to meet a friend for lunch, I saw two boys harassing an elderly man, an old scrap of a man. I stepped in. It looked like it was getting bad and that they didn't stop when they saw that I was there really unnerved me. These boys, who were around 12, didn't care and the three of them were heading to a busy street with no one paying attention. The old man was mad, but he was no match. I would probably be no match for kids that arrogant. Still, what would you do? So I told them to piss off and stayed with the old man until I knew he was on his way and not followed.

For fuck sake. Excuse my language, but I was--and still am--pissed. Furious. Before he left, the old man said that what they did to him was horrible, but that he didn't want to discuss it. Good grief. Where do you get off harassing another? And how does picking on an old man, and I am talking very elderly, make you a better person?

I thought it was the worst day for me in a long time. I was upset. Wouldn't you be? I was also nervous. Will I be followed? Are they regulars? Will they recognise me? And what are two kids doing out of school at 11:30?

But that was nothing to what happened tonight.

The Pat Carroll Running Group (Peecie Argie) got a large group together to watch The Spirit of the Marathon at a theatre on the river. It wasn't a large theatre, so that we filled it was no big deal, but it was great to share the movie with other runners.

On the way back to the CityCat stop, a couple stopped us. They were embarrased to ask, but wondered what we thought something was in the river. It was dark and we were beyond where the walkway was lit. Okay, sure. Let's look.

I knew.

Dead.

It was a dead man. They weren't sure. Could it be a plastic bag? Could be. But I saw arms and a hint of legs. I knew. Had to. They were nervous about calling. What if we're wrong. I understood. How embarrassing to call in a busy police squad to haul in a bag or a big, dead fish. But I knew.  And I called 000.

After a confusing phone call (Do you need an ambulance? No, it's pretty pointless at this time. Where are you? On the walk way between the CityCat stop and the movie theatre.), I was told to stay there and wait.

And we did.

It was a weird time. I didn't look at my watch, so I don't know how long we were there, but--and not to be trite during tragedy--it was the worst "watched pot never boils" time lag for us. We kept trying to convince ourselves, we and this other couple, that we were wrong.

But we weren't. It was dark, but I knew. I think they knew, too. There was the back. Nothing floats like that.

Eventually, the police called for better directions. Remember, we're on the river walk. It's after a 7 o'clock movie ended. Was it 9 ish? We're between the river and a big wall that separates the units. They're going to have to park and find us by walking. There is no quick drive.

They arrived two minutes later. When we pointed to the floating object about 5 metres from us, they shone the flashlight.

There was no doubt. Someone lost a son. He was young. I won't go into detail about his appearance, but just know that he was a young man, and he wasn't supposed to die today. He didn't look bad. I mean, he wasn't bloated. There were no marks visible to us. I still hoped he'd lift his head and apologise for scaring us. I know that's weird, but for some reason--no matter how sure I was before--I wanted to hope he was just an ass goofing around. He did not look dead.

I know I should think it was a bad day for him. Sure, it was. But he's not suffering anymore. I just think about his parents, friends, girlfriend or boyfriend. Siblings. He'll be missed. Their lives are about to change forever. This is their bad day. Their worst day.

Because we didn't find the body, we were allowed to go on. The police took the details of the other couple. We were free to go. Free. Free to go home, to bed. My life goes on. I still have my Mark. I was not abused or harassed by kids. I have a lot to be thankful for if fleas are my worst problem.

Good night.

p.s. sorry for any glaring errors. i choose not to re-read this.

Comments

[Not Joyful]

Oh Katy, that is just horrible. Just awful. I can't even imagine having a day like that. I'd take fleas over a dead body any day.I hope you can get some rest and get this our of your mind, somehow. I have shivers after reading this.

[Ellen]

An awful day. To be sure. The Planet Earth can be a tough place to live sometimes. And I hate it when people I love are involved. But I'm so glad there are people like you who will step up and do the right thing even when it would have been so much easier to just walk away. I'm so so proud of you, your good heart and your fiery spirit, your courage and your determination. And I'm so glad the bad things happened on the same day and are behind you now. You're a blessing to this place.

[Dick]

I guess if I'd been given to know that if I went out today, I'd have the choice of stepping between a couple of young but unruly and maybe dangerous boys and an old man, and then later on be called on to verify that someone was dead and floating in the river, I wouldn't have gone out. I'd have stayed home. But we're not given to know such things, and you didn't have that choice of going or staying. Instead, you had the choice of helping or not helping, both times. I'm very sorry you were in both situations. I'm sorry for what you went through, both times. But for what it's worth, I'm very proud of you and the choices you made, both times. I'd not thought of Ellen's idea, but I, too, am glad they both happened on the same day and are both past you. I love you. LP

[I sing to greyhounds]

I think that you were in both those places for a reason. I don't know what the reason is. I dont know if there are answers to day's like this. I think you were there because you are a strong person. You don't take shit from people and you don't let other people get shat on. Today you probably made that old man believe that there still is some good in the world. Maybe you were the one to be at the river because you always know what to do. Maybe you were there because that poor soul needed someone that would not freak out - they would be calm and get help and treat the situation with digniy. And maybe you had to see all of this because if someone who was not as strong as you saw it they would fall to bits. Maybe that person would not have a Mark to go home to and have no way of dealing with it. For whatever reason, I am sad that it happened to you because I love you and you are a wonderful and supportive friend. Tomorrow is a always a new day...

[21stCenturyMom]

How horrible and traumatic. You poor thing. Of course I thought at first it was the old man in the river which would also have been horrible but a child - worse yet.

I hope this day doesn't haunt your memory for too long - that you can somehow put it in a place where it matters but doesn't overwhelm you. Of course the family of that young male have no such options and my heart goes out to them but I can't write them a note.

Hugs to you, Katy

[Alex]

This world can be a scary, brutal place for sure.
But remember, you didn't turn your back, you didn't run scared, instead YOU were the change, that you (and we all), want to see in the world.

[LBTEPA]

what a day.
you did humanity proud today.
take care mate

[LBTEPA]

BTW sorry to be all soultion-focused but talking is good.
Lifeline 131114
beyond blue 1300224636
if it keeps preying on your mind the coroners office has counselling services
take care ((hugs))

[Ewen]

That's sad. And here's me expecting a post about how proud you are to be an American. Doing the right thing is something to be equally proud of. Take care.

[Jennifer]

Yikes! Good for you for stepping in to help the elderly man.... but you shouldn't have to. Stuff like that shouldn't happen. I thought stuff like that only happened in the US. And then what a topper on finding the body. Very sad, but at least you will bring closure to someone. I can't think of anything worse than not know what happened to a loved one. So maybe there is some peace in knowing that.

Have a fun trip to the States. Where are you from? Where will you be?

Jen

[Jenny]

I just want to give you a hug. ((( HUG))) Tell you how much we all love you. Don't know what else to say really. Hope you have a much better day for the rest of your days.

[Lisa]

I'm trying to think of something positive and uplifting to say to help you feel better, but my heart is in my throat, and I can't. I can't help but wonder what's in store for the world....
Chin-up, and have a great holiday
xxxx

[Cirque]

Oh God! Don't you wonder sometimes how we can all go on when there is so much sadness?
{{{{{{{{{Katy}}}}}}}}}}}

[Hege]

Good grief!!! I am with Brooke. You are a very strong person who knows how to do the right thing. You supported other people in two difficult and traumatic situations today, like only you could have done. I hope your trip home to be with your family will keep these things from haunting you.

[Rob]

Very sad day indeed. Especially for the elderly gentleman who was harassed and the family and friends of the young man who lost his life. I am sorry you had to witness it all. Tragic indeed.

[strewth]

Katy, you are a truly awesome human being - well done on being so brave and supportive to people who really needed you today. It makes me very proud to know you. xx

[twopinkfeet]

Did I read this right? Fleas were the cause of all this tragedy? It is sad that our world has become a place where 12 year-olds harass elderly people and not many of us are brave enough to step in and do something. You were brave again that night to say, yes, we need to call the police. ....as if bombing fleas weren't enough bravery for one day.

[cynical dirt doll]

aw Katy! I'm so sorry honey, but like others have said, you are a strong person with a support network. The universe puts the right people in the right places at the right times, we might not ever know why you were "the one" that day, but take comfort in knowing that someone else might not have been able to handle either problem and things could have been much much worse. You are an amazing person!

[Elizabeth]

definitely an awful day. so sorry you had to be a witness to two terrible events.

Hopefully some time with Mark in the states will have you back to normal in no time.